I can feel it. Maybe I shouldn't feel it, they say you don't feel it, you can't tell when you are dissociating. But I can.
Or maybe that isn't what it is. Maybe I just Don't Care.
That isn't very theraputic now is it.
How can I be good at what I do, if I'm not really there. Present. In the moment.
How can I be a good parent, a good friend, a good nurse?
Why is it so easy to just remove myself and not feel?
Feeling is too too complicated, and requires too much input, too much concentration, too much energy.
I need to do something different, or I will totally become a robot. No feelings, no empathy, no heart.
Judging and placing my own ideals upon someone else, being prejudiced and unfeeling about their situation.
That is not my place.
And I don't want to live there.
I must wake up, and do something different.
